If you didn't get an invite to the new, private blog, please email me at speakoftheblog@gmail.com! I am so excited about getting back into blogging and have so much to write about. I hope to see you all on the other side!
xoxo
cate
Saturday, May 15, 2010
Thursday, May 6, 2010
Happy Due Date, Buddha
Hi Sweet Boy,
I can't believe you would be turning a year old tomorrow. I can't imaging how different our lives would be, but I know all things work out the way they should and God had a plan that has now come full circle for us as a family. Your sister has brought us so much joy and we talk to her every day about you and how special you still are to us. You will always hold a special, special place in my heart. You will always be my first baby. No one will ever replace you.
Have a very HAPPY DUE DATE! Give lots of hugs and share tons of smiles.
We love you to the moon and back and to the moon again.
Love,
Momma, Daddy and Baby Abbey
I can't believe you would be turning a year old tomorrow. I can't imaging how different our lives would be, but I know all things work out the way they should and God had a plan that has now come full circle for us as a family. Your sister has brought us so much joy and we talk to her every day about you and how special you still are to us. You will always hold a special, special place in my heart. You will always be my first baby. No one will ever replace you.
Have a very HAPPY DUE DATE! Give lots of hugs and share tons of smiles.
We love you to the moon and back and to the moon again.
Love,
Momma, Daddy and Baby Abbey
Sunday, April 4, 2010
Hapy Easter, Buddha and Abbey!
We love you both so much and are so thankful for both of you. Buddha, we still think about you daily and I constantly look for rainbows every time it rains. Abbey got to see her first rainbow last week and it meant so much to me! You will always be our first baby and hold such a special place in my heart. Abbey, you are our miracle. You have brought so much love and joy and healing to me and daddy and we thank God for you every day.
We are so very proud of BOTH of you!
Love,
Momma
We are so very proud of BOTH of you!
Love,
Momma
Monday, March 22, 2010
Friday, March 5, 2010
If you're wondering...
We are doing amazing! Abbey is such a blessing and we couldn't have asked for a more perfect, beautiful daughter. She sleeps like a champ, nurses like she was born do to it (even though we are fighting low supply issues-Thanks again, PCOS!) and is more than we could have ever asked for. I will be posting a birth story at some point. Labor and delivery were interesting, but I wouldn't change a single thing about the entire day. Even if it had been the worst experience of my life (which it wasn't), I would do it all over again.
I have not got the new blog up yet, so don't think you've missed the boat if you didn't get an invite yet. This little miracle takes up my entire day (that and being chained to the pump...) so I haven't had a chance to get everything set up just yet. It's coming! I promise!
Abbey is 11 days old.
I have not got the new blog up yet, so don't think you've missed the boat if you didn't get an invite yet. This little miracle takes up my entire day (that and being chained to the pump...) so I haven't had a chance to get everything set up just yet. It's coming! I promise!
Abbey is 11 days old.
Sunday, February 28, 2010
Monday, February 8, 2010
Whoops
I've been a bad blogger. Honestly, I just haven't felt like blogging. My heart just hasn't been in it lately and time has not been on my side. I am off work now (more on that later) so it sounds like I have tons of free time, but I have tons of things to get done in that seemingly (to me) short amount of time. Here's a brief run down of everything that's been going on:
-I'm officially full term! 37w2d today! As of today, I am 3cm dilated and 50% effaced.
-Abbey and I are both doing great!
-I am still struggling with weight gain, but it's nothing to be really concerned over. Last Monday at my 36 week appt, I lost all 10 pounds I had gained up until that point. So that got me taken out of work and put on modified bed rest and earned me a super fun stay in L&D. The nurses in L&D were super, super nice and I got to go home about 5 hours after I checked in. So no biggie :)
-Abbey's room is FINISHED! I'll post pictures later.
-I'll also catch up on my belly pics from the past few weeks at some point.
And that's really all that's been going on. I've been really enjoying and savoring these last few weeks and have been spending as much time as I can just watching Miss Abbey bounce and move around in my belly. I know I've said it a million times, but I'm going to miss her being inside so, so much. Ben can't wait to get her out, I can't imagine not having her in!
If you have e-mailed me about my private blog, I have your e-mail saved and will get invites out soon. That is probably another reason I haven't blogged over here much. I have a lot of things that are more personal that I am saving and don't really feel comfortable sharing with just anyone. I'll try to get all those invites out this week at some point.
37w2d
-I'm officially full term! 37w2d today! As of today, I am 3cm dilated and 50% effaced.
-Abbey and I are both doing great!
-I am still struggling with weight gain, but it's nothing to be really concerned over. Last Monday at my 36 week appt, I lost all 10 pounds I had gained up until that point. So that got me taken out of work and put on modified bed rest and earned me a super fun stay in L&D. The nurses in L&D were super, super nice and I got to go home about 5 hours after I checked in. So no biggie :)
-Abbey's room is FINISHED! I'll post pictures later.
-I'll also catch up on my belly pics from the past few weeks at some point.
And that's really all that's been going on. I've been really enjoying and savoring these last few weeks and have been spending as much time as I can just watching Miss Abbey bounce and move around in my belly. I know I've said it a million times, but I'm going to miss her being inside so, so much. Ben can't wait to get her out, I can't imagine not having her in!
If you have e-mailed me about my private blog, I have your e-mail saved and will get invites out soon. That is probably another reason I haven't blogged over here much. I have a lot of things that are more personal that I am saving and don't really feel comfortable sharing with just anyone. I'll try to get all those invites out this week at some point.
37w2d
Saturday, January 9, 2010
33 Weeks!
How far along? 33 Weeks!
Total weight gain/loss: I gained TWO pounds! YAY! So as of last Monday, my total weight gain is a whopping FOUR pounds! At our US, Abbey weighed in at 4lbs4oz, so...haha, it balances.
Maternity clothes? I had to break down and order maternity shirts yesterday (by the way-Old Navy has all their clearance at 75% off! They also have $10 off a $50 purchase online-code: CELEBRATE. I got about 15 pieces for less than $50, including shipping).
Sleep: I have had much better luck this week. Once I figured out how to arrange my 8793 pillows in a way that makes me comfortable I am sleeping through the night. YAY!
Best moment this week: Seeing Abbey on the ultrasound Wednesday, clearly bigger than she was a month ago. Watching her move around the screen and see all of her fingers and toes is so much fun and gives us so much to look forward to!
Movement: She is trying to escape. I swear she is. Ben and I laid in bed Tuesday night and watched her roll from side to side and kick and punch. I push her feet and she pushes back. She is really a crazy baby!
Food cravings: Nothing this week, really. My appetite is back in the trashcan.
Gender: GIRL! GIRL! GIRL!
Labor Signs: No, thank you.
Belly Button in or out? Seriously, Bellybutton. GIVE IT UP.
What I miss: Not having reflux!
What I am looking forward to: Our Baby Shower on the 23rd :)
Weekly Wisdom:Soak it all in. I have friends that are just finding out they are pregnant or what gender they are having and I'm almost jealous. I hate the anxiety that comes with pregnancy, especially a pregnancy following a loss, but I loved all the milestones. Leaving first tri, finding out the sex, hitting the half way mark. I can't say enough how much I'll miss this.
Milestones: Right now, every day is a milestone. I am more pregnant than I have ever been, so everyday is a huge deal. Our goal is 40 weeks, 37 at the earliest, so every day is one day closer to our goal. (I know this has been the same since the beginning but I honestly believe it.)
What is Abbey up to?
Abbey's senses are continuing to improve -- when light peeks in through your (extremely) stretched belly, her tiny eyelids and irises blink and dilate. And, she can now recognize and react to simple songs… time to start practicing lullabies! Growth (at least inside the womb) is starting to slow, and you may notice baby descend into your pelvis at the end of this month.
^^That's the second to last fruit picture! There's only ONE more! Holy crap!
And since I'm lazy, I didn't update after our appointment on Monday OR our ultrasound on Wednesday. The appointment Monday wasn't exciting. Blood pressure was 117/79, textbook perfect. I gained a whole 2 pounds. Abbey was transverse breech and my belly was measuring exactly 32 weeks.
Wednesday was more exciting because it was ultrasound day! (I can't believe I only have one more ultrasound before I get to see her in person and hold her squishy butt!) She is growing and that's the important thing! So for now, I am staying on Metformin because it does control my PCOS so well and it isn't harming Abbey. She was in the 30% overall last time and her belly measured in the 12%. This time, she was almost in the 40% and her belly had grown to the 15%! YAY Abbey! As you can see in the picture above, 4lbs2oz is the lower average for 32 week babies and our IttyBitty weighed in at 4lbs4oz! I cried I was so happy to see her growing and thriving. Her fluid levels, cord and placenta all looked amazing and as of right now IUGR is NOT a concern for our little one! God is amazing and I can't thank you all enough for your prayers and support!
One last thing, if you left your email address in the comments below, I have it! If you emailed me at speakoftheblog@gmail.com and didn't get a reply, email me again. I think I got everyone back, but it's not unlike me to look over things. I'll be making the jump to the private blog probably in February, so you still have plenty of time to get in touch with me :)
I hope you are all having a great 2010! As soon as I take our Week 33 picture, I'll add both it and Week 32. Promise!
33 Weeks
Total weight gain/loss: I gained TWO pounds! YAY! So as of last Monday, my total weight gain is a whopping FOUR pounds! At our US, Abbey weighed in at 4lbs4oz, so...haha, it balances.
Maternity clothes? I had to break down and order maternity shirts yesterday (by the way-Old Navy has all their clearance at 75% off! They also have $10 off a $50 purchase online-code: CELEBRATE. I got about 15 pieces for less than $50, including shipping).
Sleep: I have had much better luck this week. Once I figured out how to arrange my 8793 pillows in a way that makes me comfortable I am sleeping through the night. YAY!
Best moment this week: Seeing Abbey on the ultrasound Wednesday, clearly bigger than she was a month ago. Watching her move around the screen and see all of her fingers and toes is so much fun and gives us so much to look forward to!
Movement: She is trying to escape. I swear she is. Ben and I laid in bed Tuesday night and watched her roll from side to side and kick and punch. I push her feet and she pushes back. She is really a crazy baby!
Food cravings: Nothing this week, really. My appetite is back in the trashcan.
Gender: GIRL! GIRL! GIRL!
Labor Signs: No, thank you.
Belly Button in or out? Seriously, Bellybutton. GIVE IT UP.
What I miss: Not having reflux!
What I am looking forward to: Our Baby Shower on the 23rd :)
Weekly Wisdom:Soak it all in. I have friends that are just finding out they are pregnant or what gender they are having and I'm almost jealous. I hate the anxiety that comes with pregnancy, especially a pregnancy following a loss, but I loved all the milestones. Leaving first tri, finding out the sex, hitting the half way mark. I can't say enough how much I'll miss this.
Milestones: Right now, every day is a milestone. I am more pregnant than I have ever been, so everyday is a huge deal. Our goal is 40 weeks, 37 at the earliest, so every day is one day closer to our goal. (I know this has been the same since the beginning but I honestly believe it.)
What is Abbey up to?
Abbey's senses are continuing to improve -- when light peeks in through your (extremely) stretched belly, her tiny eyelids and irises blink and dilate. And, she can now recognize and react to simple songs… time to start practicing lullabies! Growth (at least inside the womb) is starting to slow, and you may notice baby descend into your pelvis at the end of this month.
^^That's the second to last fruit picture! There's only ONE more! Holy crap!
And since I'm lazy, I didn't update after our appointment on Monday OR our ultrasound on Wednesday. The appointment Monday wasn't exciting. Blood pressure was 117/79, textbook perfect. I gained a whole 2 pounds. Abbey was transverse breech and my belly was measuring exactly 32 weeks.
Wednesday was more exciting because it was ultrasound day! (I can't believe I only have one more ultrasound before I get to see her in person and hold her squishy butt!) She is growing and that's the important thing! So for now, I am staying on Metformin because it does control my PCOS so well and it isn't harming Abbey. She was in the 30% overall last time and her belly measured in the 12%. This time, she was almost in the 40% and her belly had grown to the 15%! YAY Abbey! As you can see in the picture above, 4lbs2oz is the lower average for 32 week babies and our IttyBitty weighed in at 4lbs4oz! I cried I was so happy to see her growing and thriving. Her fluid levels, cord and placenta all looked amazing and as of right now IUGR is NOT a concern for our little one! God is amazing and I can't thank you all enough for your prayers and support!
One last thing, if you left your email address in the comments below, I have it! If you emailed me at speakoftheblog@gmail.com and didn't get a reply, email me again. I think I got everyone back, but it's not unlike me to look over things. I'll be making the jump to the private blog probably in February, so you still have plenty of time to get in touch with me :)
I hope you are all having a great 2010! As soon as I take our Week 33 picture, I'll add both it and Week 32. Promise!
33 Weeks
Saturday, January 2, 2010
32 Weeks!
How far along? 32 Weeks!
Total weight gain/loss: I am still struggling with my appetite. I'm trying to make sure the calories I am taking in are good calories that will benefit Abbey the most and help her gain weight. My official weigh in is Monday afternoon-wish me luck!
Maternity clothes? Thankfully I got some maternity shirts for Christmas that are really cute and are much more comfy. However, I'm not even sure they will make it through the next 6-7 weeks! I swear I get bigger every day at this point.
Sleep: I don't want to talk about it. But I will. Sleep at this point would be awesome. But between the fact that my hips seriously feel like they might snap in half when I lay on my side, the paralyzing spasms I get in my left hip joint and the radiating reflux that flares up when I go 1 degree past sitting straight up, my sleep is suffering. Really. It's not unbearable and once I get enough pillows (read: literally every pillow in the house) adjusted in just the right way, I can get a good 4-6 hours in at a stretch. Abbey loves to dance as soon as I lay down so I don't really mind staying up to watch her bounce around :)
Best moment this week: WARNING: Totally cheesy moment ahead. I love Ben and I know he loves me. But I was standing in the kitchen this week and he walked up behind me, wrapped his arms around my middle and put his hands over Abbey. It's like she knew it was him because she moved right over to where his hands were on my belly and snuggled in and kicked his hands. It seriously made my heart melt. She's so in love with her daddy already.
Movement: She bounces like crazy and I can't get enough of it. It makes me sad to think this is all coming to an end. I really will miss her feet in my bladder.
Food cravings: Milk. Pineapple. Bagels and cream cheese (but only from Tim Horton's!)
Gender: GIRL! GIRL! GIRL!
Labor Signs: No, thank you.
Belly Button in or out? Give it up, Bellybutton. You're done! Throw int he towel!
What I miss: Not having reflux!
What I am looking forward to: Seeing Abbey at our US January 6!
Weekly Wisdom: Some people will never be happy for you. Forget them. Seriously. I have always found room to be happy for someone else no matter how sad or envious I am of them or their situation. Some people really struggle with that and it's kind of sad. I'd hate to be that self involved.
Milestones: Right now, every day is a milestone. I am more pregnant than I have ever been, so everyday is a huge deal. Our goal is 40 weeks, 37 at the earliest, so every day is one day closer to our goal. (I know this has been the same since the beginning but I honestly believe it.)
There is no fruit picture this week, but there will be one next week and it's the second to last one! You have no idea how sad that makes me. I remember when we were back at the apple seed and now we are edging closer to the watermelon. Slow down, time!
I'll try to update Monday after my appt! Hopefully I'll be seeing my OB and not her partner :) If not...there will probably be tears!
Oh, and we will TRY to start our L&D classes again this Tuesday! This is our third attempt (and our last chance) at taking these classes so hopefully they don't drop the ball (again!).
32 Weeks
Total weight gain/loss: I am still struggling with my appetite. I'm trying to make sure the calories I am taking in are good calories that will benefit Abbey the most and help her gain weight. My official weigh in is Monday afternoon-wish me luck!
Maternity clothes? Thankfully I got some maternity shirts for Christmas that are really cute and are much more comfy. However, I'm not even sure they will make it through the next 6-7 weeks! I swear I get bigger every day at this point.
Sleep: I don't want to talk about it. But I will. Sleep at this point would be awesome. But between the fact that my hips seriously feel like they might snap in half when I lay on my side, the paralyzing spasms I get in my left hip joint and the radiating reflux that flares up when I go 1 degree past sitting straight up, my sleep is suffering. Really. It's not unbearable and once I get enough pillows (read: literally every pillow in the house) adjusted in just the right way, I can get a good 4-6 hours in at a stretch. Abbey loves to dance as soon as I lay down so I don't really mind staying up to watch her bounce around :)
Best moment this week: WARNING: Totally cheesy moment ahead. I love Ben and I know he loves me. But I was standing in the kitchen this week and he walked up behind me, wrapped his arms around my middle and put his hands over Abbey. It's like she knew it was him because she moved right over to where his hands were on my belly and snuggled in and kicked his hands. It seriously made my heart melt. She's so in love with her daddy already.
Movement: She bounces like crazy and I can't get enough of it. It makes me sad to think this is all coming to an end. I really will miss her feet in my bladder.
Food cravings: Milk. Pineapple. Bagels and cream cheese (but only from Tim Horton's!)
Gender: GIRL! GIRL! GIRL!
Labor Signs: No, thank you.
Belly Button in or out? Give it up, Bellybutton. You're done! Throw int he towel!
What I miss: Not having reflux!
What I am looking forward to: Seeing Abbey at our US January 6!
Weekly Wisdom: Some people will never be happy for you. Forget them. Seriously. I have always found room to be happy for someone else no matter how sad or envious I am of them or their situation. Some people really struggle with that and it's kind of sad. I'd hate to be that self involved.
Milestones: Right now, every day is a milestone. I am more pregnant than I have ever been, so everyday is a huge deal. Our goal is 40 weeks, 37 at the earliest, so every day is one day closer to our goal. (I know this has been the same since the beginning but I honestly believe it.)
There is no fruit picture this week, but there will be one next week and it's the second to last one! You have no idea how sad that makes me. I remember when we were back at the apple seed and now we are edging closer to the watermelon. Slow down, time!
I'll try to update Monday after my appt! Hopefully I'll be seeing my OB and not her partner :) If not...there will probably be tears!
Oh, and we will TRY to start our L&D classes again this Tuesday! This is our third attempt (and our last chance) at taking these classes so hopefully they don't drop the ball (again!).
32 Weeks
Friday, January 1, 2010
Happy New Year!
I hope everyone had a safe and enjoyable New Year!
We got pretty crazy here at our house. My dad came in, we ordered Pizza Hut, watched The Hangover and were in bed by 12:30am. WHOA. Pretty insane. haha. It was low key and easy and that's all I was looking for.
First, here is my 31 Week Belly Pic from last week:
And that would be Boston, one of our Boxers, being a punk and sneaking into the picture. He LOVES being in Abbey's room even though he knows it is technically off limits. You can tell by his face he knows he is busted.
Anyway, Ben and I were talking today and I almost fell out of my seat when he said "Ya know, we are having a baby next month."
Um, excuse me? Next month? Holy snot. Where has time gone? I remember getting our BFP back in June like it happened yesterday. I'm so not ready for this to be over. I'm really not.I've loved every minute of this pregnancy, even barfing my head off in the shower and readjusting myself 93898 times at night because it feels like my hips might break in half. I know and Ben knows that no matter how much I have enjoyed this pregnancy, this is likely our last. I don't really want to go through the stress of TTC again, I definitely don't want to go through the insanity of Clomid and thousands of dates with dildo cam's again and honestly, I think one baby here is enough. We've got an angel and a baby. What else do we need? We both have good jobs and make pretty good money, so lack of funding isn't keeping us from going for two. There is something stuck in our heads that says one will be enough. We already love Abbey (and Buddha) so much that I can't imagine sharing that love with another. As I've said, we write nothing in stone. If God chooses to bless us again or points us down the road of adoption, we are open to it. But at the moment, it's far from our minds and not remotely close to being in our interests. (By the way, why does everyone ask if we will be having another baby? Can't we get this one here before we have to yield that question?)
Speaking of Buddha, I've slipped back into some sort of funk about losing him lately. I don't know if it's the holidays that remind me I should have a baby in my arms now, taking his pictures as he opens presents, showing him off at family gatherings. Or maybe it's that I constantly get asked about this pregnancy when we go out. It never fails. Someone asks "Is this your first baby?" Ugh. I get a knot in my stomach when I get asked that. It's not our first, but it's just easier to smile and say yes. Then I get this wave of guilt that washes over me that wants to retract that statement and tell them all about Buddha and how great our time with him was and how special he still is to us. But I don't. It's a really awkward spot between a rock and a hard spot. There is no right answer. Buddha is always going to be our angel. Abbey will always (God willing) be our baby. But how do you explain that to a stranger who asks an innocent question in under 10 seconds?
I'm so excited for 2010. I will spend the evenings watching Abbey dance in my belly. Ben will continue to bring me water or pillows or whatever I need at the time. We will hopefully catch a few more movies in the theater before our movie going days are over. We will be welcoming our daughter and completing our family. We will learn how to be parents. We will be growing as a couple (and hopefully not killing each other in the process). We will be going on a lot more adrenaline and a lot less sleep. We will be focusing on spending more time with our families. We will get to watch Abbey grow and learn right in front of us. We are so excited and can't wait to see what God has in store for us.
Buddha, I hope you enjoyed your New Year! I'm sure the celebration up there was more exciting than ours was here at home. Your dad and I still think about you and talk about you every day. You are never far from our hearts or our minds. Please don't think you are ever going to be left behind, as you are permanently attached to my heart. Every day I can feel you slowly mending the hole that was left in my heart the day we lost you. It's not closed yet, but it's getting there. We love you so, so much.
Abbey, I know we both tell you a thousand times a day we love you, but it's so much more than that. You make me smile more times in a day than I can count. You are just like your momma in so many ways. You dance like crazy when I watch my favorite shows. It makes me laugh so hard when I listen to Britney Spears in the car (partly to drive your dad nuts and partly because she is so darn catchy!) and we watch you bounce around at the stoplights. But you are just like your daddy in all the ways that make me love him most. You always give one big stretch right before you settle in for a nap just like he does. You instantly relax when you listen to your Bob Marley lullaby CD. I love watching your daddy light up when he feels you kick so hard. You are our miracle and we can't wait to meet you (next month!).
And Bellybutton, throw in the towel. You've made it 32 weeks. It's okay. Ben and I laugh at your feeble attempts to hang on, but it's getting kinda sad. Every day you are more shallow than you were the day before. You fought the good fight and it's really okay to pop out like a turkey timer now, haha! You will go back to your deep state once again...someday.
31w6d
PS- If you haven't emailed me about a request for the private blog and are interested in still following us, email me at speakoftheblog@gmail.com. I have tried to email those of you have contacted me so you know I received your message. If you don't hear back from me, email me again!
We got pretty crazy here at our house. My dad came in, we ordered Pizza Hut, watched The Hangover and were in bed by 12:30am. WHOA. Pretty insane. haha. It was low key and easy and that's all I was looking for.
First, here is my 31 Week Belly Pic from last week:
And that would be Boston, one of our Boxers, being a punk and sneaking into the picture. He LOVES being in Abbey's room even though he knows it is technically off limits. You can tell by his face he knows he is busted.Anyway, Ben and I were talking today and I almost fell out of my seat when he said "Ya know, we are having a baby next month."
Um, excuse me? Next month? Holy snot. Where has time gone? I remember getting our BFP back in June like it happened yesterday. I'm so not ready for this to be over. I'm really not.I've loved every minute of this pregnancy, even barfing my head off in the shower and readjusting myself 93898 times at night because it feels like my hips might break in half. I know and Ben knows that no matter how much I have enjoyed this pregnancy, this is likely our last. I don't really want to go through the stress of TTC again, I definitely don't want to go through the insanity of Clomid and thousands of dates with dildo cam's again and honestly, I think one baby here is enough. We've got an angel and a baby. What else do we need? We both have good jobs and make pretty good money, so lack of funding isn't keeping us from going for two. There is something stuck in our heads that says one will be enough. We already love Abbey (and Buddha) so much that I can't imagine sharing that love with another. As I've said, we write nothing in stone. If God chooses to bless us again or points us down the road of adoption, we are open to it. But at the moment, it's far from our minds and not remotely close to being in our interests. (By the way, why does everyone ask if we will be having another baby? Can't we get this one here before we have to yield that question?)
Speaking of Buddha, I've slipped back into some sort of funk about losing him lately. I don't know if it's the holidays that remind me I should have a baby in my arms now, taking his pictures as he opens presents, showing him off at family gatherings. Or maybe it's that I constantly get asked about this pregnancy when we go out. It never fails. Someone asks "Is this your first baby?" Ugh. I get a knot in my stomach when I get asked that. It's not our first, but it's just easier to smile and say yes. Then I get this wave of guilt that washes over me that wants to retract that statement and tell them all about Buddha and how great our time with him was and how special he still is to us. But I don't. It's a really awkward spot between a rock and a hard spot. There is no right answer. Buddha is always going to be our angel. Abbey will always (God willing) be our baby. But how do you explain that to a stranger who asks an innocent question in under 10 seconds?
I'm so excited for 2010. I will spend the evenings watching Abbey dance in my belly. Ben will continue to bring me water or pillows or whatever I need at the time. We will hopefully catch a few more movies in the theater before our movie going days are over. We will be welcoming our daughter and completing our family. We will learn how to be parents. We will be growing as a couple (and hopefully not killing each other in the process). We will be going on a lot more adrenaline and a lot less sleep. We will be focusing on spending more time with our families. We will get to watch Abbey grow and learn right in front of us. We are so excited and can't wait to see what God has in store for us.
Buddha, I hope you enjoyed your New Year! I'm sure the celebration up there was more exciting than ours was here at home. Your dad and I still think about you and talk about you every day. You are never far from our hearts or our minds. Please don't think you are ever going to be left behind, as you are permanently attached to my heart. Every day I can feel you slowly mending the hole that was left in my heart the day we lost you. It's not closed yet, but it's getting there. We love you so, so much.
Abbey, I know we both tell you a thousand times a day we love you, but it's so much more than that. You make me smile more times in a day than I can count. You are just like your momma in so many ways. You dance like crazy when I watch my favorite shows. It makes me laugh so hard when I listen to Britney Spears in the car (partly to drive your dad nuts and partly because she is so darn catchy!) and we watch you bounce around at the stoplights. But you are just like your daddy in all the ways that make me love him most. You always give one big stretch right before you settle in for a nap just like he does. You instantly relax when you listen to your Bob Marley lullaby CD. I love watching your daddy light up when he feels you kick so hard. You are our miracle and we can't wait to meet you (next month!).
And Bellybutton, throw in the towel. You've made it 32 weeks. It's okay. Ben and I laugh at your feeble attempts to hang on, but it's getting kinda sad. Every day you are more shallow than you were the day before. You fought the good fight and it's really okay to pop out like a turkey timer now, haha! You will go back to your deep state once again...someday.
31w6d
PS- If you haven't emailed me about a request for the private blog and are interested in still following us, email me at speakoftheblog@gmail.com. I have tried to email those of you have contacted me so you know I received your message. If you don't hear back from me, email me again!
Saturday, December 26, 2009
31 Weeks and A Major Score!
Here we go!
How far along? 31 Weeks!
Total weight gain/loss: I have had ZERO appetite this week, so the "high calorie" diet isn't exactly going as planned. I'm taking in as much protein as I can to make up for the calories I am not taking in. I go back a week from Monday to weigh in. O_O
Maternity clothes? Maternity pants every day and still trying to make my regular shirts work. I got several really cute maternity shirts from my MIL for Christmas that will hopefully see me through the end!
Sleep: Oy. I've been REALLY lucky up until this point. I really have. But this past week has been brutal in the sleep department. I sleep when I can, but between getting up to pee (which thankfully is still only once a night and that just started this past week-up until now I've been sleeping through the night), the hip pain and my ribs feeling like they were going to split down the middle, sleep is definitely getting harder. I wouldn't trade it for anything though.
Best moment this week: Being pregnant at Christmas. In my own odd little world, there is something special about being pregnant at Christmas. I am so thankful I got to experience it. Abbey bounced around and moved all day and that really was the best gift I could have ever asked for (but the iPod touch was a close second!).
Movement: She bounces like crazy and I can't get enough of it. It makes me sad to think this is all coming to an end. I really will miss her feet in my bladder.
Food cravings: M&M Cookie from Great American Cookie Co. I've had 2 this week. Ooops.
Gender: GIRL! GIRL! GIRL!
Labor Signs: No, thank you.
Belly Button in or out? Going, going.....
What I miss: Nothing at the moment...
What I am looking forward to: Seeing Abbey at our US January 6!
Weekly Wisdom: Enjoy every minute. I am so sad this whole experience is almost over. This is probably our last pregnancy so I know it's possible I'll never feel a baby bounce around and wiggle in my belly. I can't even talk about it without tearing up.
Milestones: Right now, every day is a milestone. I am more pregnant than I have ever been, so everyday is a huge deal. Our goal is 40 weeks, 37 at the earliest, so every day is one day closer to our goal. (I know this has been the same since the beginning but I honestly believe it.)
Sadly, there is no fruit/veggie pic this week. There is a belly pic, but I haven't uploaded them just yet. It's coming. I promise. Probably...tomorrow.
Now, this major score I mentioned above. I have been collecting (read:hoarding) diaper coupons and formula coupons and any other coupons I can get my hands on since the second we found out we were pregnant back in June...and maybe even before then. Many of them were nearing their expiration date so I made 938 different little stacks, one for diapers, one for formula, toys, wipes, gear, etc. I noticed some were store coupons (specifically Target) and the others were from manufacturers. So I googled around and asked a few friends for the inside scoop on all these coupons and got more than I expected. Apparently you can stack 1 manufacturers coupon with a Target coupon. So here's what I did: I paired up 1 Manuf. coupon with whatever Target coupon I had. Then I checked to see if you had to buy multiple things (ie: diapers AND wipes) in order to use the coupons. Then I checked to see if I had a coupon that I could use with the "other" item from the initial coupon. I then I stacked three coupons for two different items, taking as much as $9 off the two items. Make sense? No? It's hard to explain, so let's add brand names.
I had 1 Manf coupon for $3 off 1 package of Pampers diapers AND wipes, 1 Target coupon for $3 off a package of Pampers diapers and 1 Target coupon for $3 off 1 package of Pampers wipes (and I had three of each of those, so I used this whole thing three times over, all on the same check out order). So I got 1 box of Pampers and 1 package of wipes and used all three coupons on the two items.
So, by the time I had used some of my stash of coupons up, we left Target 3 large boxes of diapers, 3 large packs of wipes, 2 cans of Similac powder formula and 1 bottle of ready made Similac formula for less than $40! (Our initial total was almost $90, ending total, after coupons was $42.05, but I bought some socks and a few clearance Christmas items). I think the best buy was the formula. The ready made bottle was $5.34 before the coupon. I had a $5 off coupon which left the bottle costing .34 cents! I also had a $5 off any baby purchase of $25 or more that I was able to throw in on top of everything.
Moral of the story: USE YOUR COUPONS. Not using them is literally throwing money in the trash. And if you don't use yours, send them to me, hahaha!
I hope you all had a great Christmas and got everything you could have ever wanted!
31Weeks
How far along? 31 Weeks!
Total weight gain/loss: I have had ZERO appetite this week, so the "high calorie" diet isn't exactly going as planned. I'm taking in as much protein as I can to make up for the calories I am not taking in. I go back a week from Monday to weigh in. O_O
Maternity clothes? Maternity pants every day and still trying to make my regular shirts work. I got several really cute maternity shirts from my MIL for Christmas that will hopefully see me through the end!
Sleep: Oy. I've been REALLY lucky up until this point. I really have. But this past week has been brutal in the sleep department. I sleep when I can, but between getting up to pee (which thankfully is still only once a night and that just started this past week-up until now I've been sleeping through the night), the hip pain and my ribs feeling like they were going to split down the middle, sleep is definitely getting harder. I wouldn't trade it for anything though.
Best moment this week: Being pregnant at Christmas. In my own odd little world, there is something special about being pregnant at Christmas. I am so thankful I got to experience it. Abbey bounced around and moved all day and that really was the best gift I could have ever asked for (but the iPod touch was a close second!).
Movement: She bounces like crazy and I can't get enough of it. It makes me sad to think this is all coming to an end. I really will miss her feet in my bladder.
Food cravings: M&M Cookie from Great American Cookie Co. I've had 2 this week. Ooops.
Gender: GIRL! GIRL! GIRL!
Labor Signs: No, thank you.
Belly Button in or out? Going, going.....
What I miss: Nothing at the moment...
What I am looking forward to: Seeing Abbey at our US January 6!
Weekly Wisdom: Enjoy every minute. I am so sad this whole experience is almost over. This is probably our last pregnancy so I know it's possible I'll never feel a baby bounce around and wiggle in my belly. I can't even talk about it without tearing up.
Milestones: Right now, every day is a milestone. I am more pregnant than I have ever been, so everyday is a huge deal. Our goal is 40 weeks, 37 at the earliest, so every day is one day closer to our goal. (I know this has been the same since the beginning but I honestly believe it.)
Sadly, there is no fruit/veggie pic this week. There is a belly pic, but I haven't uploaded them just yet. It's coming. I promise. Probably...tomorrow.
Now, this major score I mentioned above. I have been collecting (read:hoarding) diaper coupons and formula coupons and any other coupons I can get my hands on since the second we found out we were pregnant back in June...and maybe even before then. Many of them were nearing their expiration date so I made 938 different little stacks, one for diapers, one for formula, toys, wipes, gear, etc. I noticed some were store coupons (specifically Target) and the others were from manufacturers. So I googled around and asked a few friends for the inside scoop on all these coupons and got more than I expected. Apparently you can stack 1 manufacturers coupon with a Target coupon. So here's what I did: I paired up 1 Manuf. coupon with whatever Target coupon I had. Then I checked to see if you had to buy multiple things (ie: diapers AND wipes) in order to use the coupons. Then I checked to see if I had a coupon that I could use with the "other" item from the initial coupon. I then I stacked three coupons for two different items, taking as much as $9 off the two items. Make sense? No? It's hard to explain, so let's add brand names.
I had 1 Manf coupon for $3 off 1 package of Pampers diapers AND wipes, 1 Target coupon for $3 off a package of Pampers diapers and 1 Target coupon for $3 off 1 package of Pampers wipes (and I had three of each of those, so I used this whole thing three times over, all on the same check out order). So I got 1 box of Pampers and 1 package of wipes and used all three coupons on the two items.
So, by the time I had used some of my stash of coupons up, we left Target 3 large boxes of diapers, 3 large packs of wipes, 2 cans of Similac powder formula and 1 bottle of ready made Similac formula for less than $40! (Our initial total was almost $90, ending total, after coupons was $42.05, but I bought some socks and a few clearance Christmas items). I think the best buy was the formula. The ready made bottle was $5.34 before the coupon. I had a $5 off coupon which left the bottle costing .34 cents! I also had a $5 off any baby purchase of $25 or more that I was able to throw in on top of everything.
Moral of the story: USE YOUR COUPONS. Not using them is literally throwing money in the trash. And if you don't use yours, send them to me, hahaha!
I hope you all had a great Christmas and got everything you could have ever wanted!
31Weeks
Friday, December 25, 2009
Merry Christmas, Buddha!
Hi, Baby Boy!
I hope you are having the very best Christmas up there! Your dad and I miss you so much, especially around the holidays, but THANK YOU for the Christmas gift today! We were in the middle of an ugly rain storm on the way home from Grammy's house and as soon as we peaked over a huge hill we saw a big, fat, bright rainbow! It was beautiful and instantly made me tear up. I'm so glad you remembered us and said hi! It's so great to know you are doing well.
Your sister is going crazy right now on my bladder :) She's so silly and I think she is going to be a lot like you. We have some of the things we bought for you set up in her room. I'm sure you won't mind sharing...right? Haha.
Your dad and I are so, so blessed and thankful that we get to call you ours. We will never, ever forget what a huge part of our life that we were and still are. One of our biggest goals with Abbey is to make sure she knows everything about you and how lucky she is to already have a guardian angel.
We love you so, so much baby boy. Be good.
Love,
momma
I hope you are having the very best Christmas up there! Your dad and I miss you so much, especially around the holidays, but THANK YOU for the Christmas gift today! We were in the middle of an ugly rain storm on the way home from Grammy's house and as soon as we peaked over a huge hill we saw a big, fat, bright rainbow! It was beautiful and instantly made me tear up. I'm so glad you remembered us and said hi! It's so great to know you are doing well.
Your sister is going crazy right now on my bladder :) She's so silly and I think she is going to be a lot like you. We have some of the things we bought for you set up in her room. I'm sure you won't mind sharing...right? Haha.
Your dad and I are so, so blessed and thankful that we get to call you ours. We will never, ever forget what a huge part of our life that we were and still are. One of our biggest goals with Abbey is to make sure she knows everything about you and how lucky she is to already have a guardian angel.
We love you so, so much baby boy. Be good.
Love,
momma
Tuesday, December 22, 2009
30 Weeks (!)
YIKES! We are really in the home stretch now, aren't we!
How far along? 30 Weeks!
Total weight gain/loss: Gained one over the past two weeks despite upping my calories and protein. Up 2 pounds overall.
Maternity clothes? Maternity pants every day and still trying to make my regular shirts work. I am hoping to buy as few maternity shirts as possible!
Sleep: I have to admit, it's getting harder. My hips and ribs HURT. But once I'm asleep, I usually sleep straight through the night, it's just getting to sleep that's the hard part.
Best moment this week: Making it to 30 weeks. I still can't believe it.
Movement: She bounces like crazy and I can't get enough of it. I already know I'll miss this.
Food cravings: Apple juice, apples, applesauce. Anything apple. (STILL)
Gender: GIRL! GIRL! GIRL!
Labor Signs: No, thank you.
Belly Button in or out? Going, going.....
What I miss: Nothing at the moment...
What I am looking forward to: Seeing Abbey at our US January 6!
Weekly Wisdom: Enjoy every minute. I am so sad this whole experience is almost over. This is probably our last pregnancy so I know it's possible I'll never feel a baby bounce around and wiggle in my belly. I can't even talk about it without tearing up.
Milestones: Right now, every day is a milestone. I am more pregnant than I have ever been, so everyday is a huge deal. Our goal is 40 weeks, 37 at the earliest, so every day is one day closer to our goal. (I know this has been the same since the beginning but I honestly believe it.)
What is Abbey up to this week?
Baby’s energy is surging, thanks to the formation of white fat deposits beneath the skin. (Have those kicks and jabs to the ribs tipped you off yet?) Baby is also settling into sleeping and waking cycles, though -- as you’ve also probably noticed -- they don’t necessarily coincide with your own. Also this month, all five senses are finally functional, and the brain and nervous system are going through major developments.
All that^ stays the same until Week 32, so don't expect another fruit picture for the next few weeks!
And now for Show&Tell :)
**I can't find my 28 Week picture. I'm going to be really upset if I either (A) forgot to take one or (B) lost the pic entirely.
29 Weeks
30 Weeks
Yowza.
And now for the real Abbey update.
We had our regular appt yesterday with my OB and everything went great. Despite being on the different diet, I only managed to gain 1 pound, not the 3-5 they were looking for. BUT gaining is better than losing. My blood pressure looked great (117/77) and Abbey's heart rate was great (152bpm). We talked at length about why Abbey looks to be small right now.
1. IUGR which in my case would be due to lack of maternal weight gain. Like I said before, since we are fairly certain Abbey has no genetic issues (NT Scan and quad screen came back clean) and since I don't do illegal drugs, lack of weight gain on my part could be one reason she is small, which is why they are pushing me to gain gain gain.
(And here's where it gets tricky and it's really hard to explain, so bear with me.)
2. Metformin. I have to be on Metformin to control my PCOS and keep my ovaries from exploding with cysts. The Metformin helps the hormones going to my ovaries know what to do as to keep cysts from growing.However, Metformin is a drug most commonly used to treat diabetics. I am not a diabetic. If anything, my sugars run on the lower side of normal as opposed to the higher side. Metformin is also known for causing weight loss. Metformin is also starting to be related to smaller (yet still healthy!) babies. Let's try a flow chart of sorts.
-I need the Metformin to control my PCOS.
-I don't need the Metformin to control diabetes because I'm not diabetic.
-The Metformin is keeping me from gaining weight.
-I can't come off the Metformin because it is doing such a good job at keeping my ovaries disease free.
-The Meformin may be what is restricting Abbey's growth.
Simply put, we are stuck for the moment. The great news is all Abbey's major organs (brain, heart, lungs, kidneys) look great and are right on track. Her cord looks great. Her fluid levels are great. She's just a small baby. We have another US in 2 weeks to check her growth and come up with a game plan for the remaining 6-8 weeks of this pregnancy.
So. We are thankful. There is nothing wrong, just a little added stress for me. I am not considered high risk at the moment and Abbey is not in any danger. We just want her to chub up a bit.
And I think that catches everything up.
One more thing. I have made the decision to go private following Abbey's arrival. I will be moving to a new, private blog that will require you to have a username and password to log view the blog. I'm doing this for several reasons, but mostly for our privacy. I don't want pictures of our daughter just floating around on the internet for anyone to see. This blog will remain public and I might update over here once in a while (minus pictures) for those who don't want to make the move, but I promise nothing.
So if you want in, please email me at speakoftheblog@gmail.com. I think I can take 100 different readers so everyone that is a "follower" now should be able to get in over "there". Family will get invites first, then friends.
WHEW! That was a long entry! If you made it this far, go get yourself a cookie!
I hope you all have a very MERRY CHRISTMAS! Remember the reason for the season :)
How far along? 30 Weeks!
Total weight gain/loss: Gained one over the past two weeks despite upping my calories and protein. Up 2 pounds overall.
Maternity clothes? Maternity pants every day and still trying to make my regular shirts work. I am hoping to buy as few maternity shirts as possible!
Sleep: I have to admit, it's getting harder. My hips and ribs HURT. But once I'm asleep, I usually sleep straight through the night, it's just getting to sleep that's the hard part.
Best moment this week: Making it to 30 weeks. I still can't believe it.
Movement: She bounces like crazy and I can't get enough of it. I already know I'll miss this.
Food cravings: Apple juice, apples, applesauce. Anything apple. (STILL)
Gender: GIRL! GIRL! GIRL!
Labor Signs: No, thank you.
Belly Button in or out? Going, going.....
What I miss: Nothing at the moment...
What I am looking forward to: Seeing Abbey at our US January 6!
Weekly Wisdom: Enjoy every minute. I am so sad this whole experience is almost over. This is probably our last pregnancy so I know it's possible I'll never feel a baby bounce around and wiggle in my belly. I can't even talk about it without tearing up.
Milestones: Right now, every day is a milestone. I am more pregnant than I have ever been, so everyday is a huge deal. Our goal is 40 weeks, 37 at the earliest, so every day is one day closer to our goal. (I know this has been the same since the beginning but I honestly believe it.)
What is Abbey up to this week?
Baby’s energy is surging, thanks to the formation of white fat deposits beneath the skin. (Have those kicks and jabs to the ribs tipped you off yet?) Baby is also settling into sleeping and waking cycles, though -- as you’ve also probably noticed -- they don’t necessarily coincide with your own. Also this month, all five senses are finally functional, and the brain and nervous system are going through major developments.
All that^ stays the same until Week 32, so don't expect another fruit picture for the next few weeks!
And now for Show&Tell :)
**I can't find my 28 Week picture. I'm going to be really upset if I either (A) forgot to take one or (B) lost the pic entirely.
29 Weeks
30 Weeks
Yowza.
And now for the real Abbey update.
We had our regular appt yesterday with my OB and everything went great. Despite being on the different diet, I only managed to gain 1 pound, not the 3-5 they were looking for. BUT gaining is better than losing. My blood pressure looked great (117/77) and Abbey's heart rate was great (152bpm). We talked at length about why Abbey looks to be small right now.
1. IUGR which in my case would be due to lack of maternal weight gain. Like I said before, since we are fairly certain Abbey has no genetic issues (NT Scan and quad screen came back clean) and since I don't do illegal drugs, lack of weight gain on my part could be one reason she is small, which is why they are pushing me to gain gain gain.
(And here's where it gets tricky and it's really hard to explain, so bear with me.)
2. Metformin. I have to be on Metformin to control my PCOS and keep my ovaries from exploding with cysts. The Metformin helps the hormones going to my ovaries know what to do as to keep cysts from growing.However, Metformin is a drug most commonly used to treat diabetics. I am not a diabetic. If anything, my sugars run on the lower side of normal as opposed to the higher side. Metformin is also known for causing weight loss. Metformin is also starting to be related to smaller (yet still healthy!) babies. Let's try a flow chart of sorts.
-I need the Metformin to control my PCOS.
-I don't need the Metformin to control diabetes because I'm not diabetic.
-The Metformin is keeping me from gaining weight.
-I can't come off the Metformin because it is doing such a good job at keeping my ovaries disease free.
-The Meformin may be what is restricting Abbey's growth.
Simply put, we are stuck for the moment. The great news is all Abbey's major organs (brain, heart, lungs, kidneys) look great and are right on track. Her cord looks great. Her fluid levels are great. She's just a small baby. We have another US in 2 weeks to check her growth and come up with a game plan for the remaining 6-8 weeks of this pregnancy.
So. We are thankful. There is nothing wrong, just a little added stress for me. I am not considered high risk at the moment and Abbey is not in any danger. We just want her to chub up a bit.
And I think that catches everything up.
One more thing. I have made the decision to go private following Abbey's arrival. I will be moving to a new, private blog that will require you to have a username and password to log view the blog. I'm doing this for several reasons, but mostly for our privacy. I don't want pictures of our daughter just floating around on the internet for anyone to see. This blog will remain public and I might update over here once in a while (minus pictures) for those who don't want to make the move, but I promise nothing.
So if you want in, please email me at speakoftheblog@gmail.com. I think I can take 100 different readers so everyone that is a "follower" now should be able to get in over "there". Family will get invites first, then friends.
WHEW! That was a long entry! If you made it this far, go get yourself a cookie!
I hope you all have a very MERRY CHRISTMAS! Remember the reason for the season :)
Wednesday, December 9, 2009
Number One Sign You Are Too Tired To Put Together An Exersaucer...
There is a recall out for our exersaucer, so I decided (at 8:30 at night after a long day) to open ours and see if it was one of with the serial number being recalled (it wasn't-Thank God! It was the model before ours). So...since it was open, I decided I'd build it. It can't be that hard, right?
Wrong.
First, I couldn't get the seat to snap in correctly. After much tugging and pulling, I get the cloth seat snapped into it's position.
Then, I couldn't get the legs to snap on. They are plastic freaking legs. It should not be that hard. So I pushed and shoved and twisted those damn legs ever which way you can think but they would not snap in. Eventually, I got one to snap in. With my finger still between each piece of plastic. Um. Ow. Ow actually isn't the word. It's much harsher. I pulled the pieces apart, threw them across the room and just burst into tears. It was not until then that it occurred to me that I just might be too tired and hormonal to put together an exersaucer (that she won't even need for another 6 months) tonight. But I get on these tangents where I think things have to be done that very minute. Ben heard the commotion and came to Abbey's room where I was "working" to find me in my undies, a tank top, surrounded by pink and green pieces of plastic sobbing. God love him for not laughing. All he said was "I think you are too tired to do this tonight. Why don't you go ahead to bed."
So here I am. In bed. Nursing my poor finger and my ego while he works on her exersaucer in the next room.
Let this be a lesson to you all. When you know you are too tired to do something, don't even attempt it.
In other news, Abbey is doing great! She's been a maniac today. On my way home, I stopped by Dairy Queen to pick up a milkshake. I ordered a small and the girls behind the counter asked if it was for me or the baby. I quickly said it was kind of for both of us since we both need to add a few pounds over the next two weeks. They laughed and asked a few more questions before one of the girls returned with a LARGE shake. They said to consider it for the baby, refused to let me pay the difference and sent me on my way. Very sweet! But- have you ever seen a LARGE shake from DQ? It's like a freakin 10 gallon drum! Who honestly needs that much? It was one of those cups you almost have to hold with both hands, lol. Out of sheer curiosity I had to look up the nutrition info when I got home. Are you sitting down? 1130 Calories. ELEVEN HUNDRED AND THIRTY CALORIES. Holy Lord. Seriously. I drank it down (poor me, right?) but promptly barfed about 1/2 of it back up. So there goes those calories. I didn't barf it up because of an pregnancy related nausea. I barfed it up because that is an obscene amount of calories to take in and 20 minutes and my body said "Heeeeeeeeeck no", haha! I barfed it up because NO ONE should drink an 1100 calorie milkshake.
So another lesson learned there. Always (politely) turn down milkshake upgrades. Or have some self control and don't drink the entire thing.
28w4d
Wrong.
First, I couldn't get the seat to snap in correctly. After much tugging and pulling, I get the cloth seat snapped into it's position.
Then, I couldn't get the legs to snap on. They are plastic freaking legs. It should not be that hard. So I pushed and shoved and twisted those damn legs ever which way you can think but they would not snap in. Eventually, I got one to snap in. With my finger still between each piece of plastic. Um. Ow. Ow actually isn't the word. It's much harsher. I pulled the pieces apart, threw them across the room and just burst into tears. It was not until then that it occurred to me that I just might be too tired and hormonal to put together an exersaucer (that she won't even need for another 6 months) tonight. But I get on these tangents where I think things have to be done that very minute. Ben heard the commotion and came to Abbey's room where I was "working" to find me in my undies, a tank top, surrounded by pink and green pieces of plastic sobbing. God love him for not laughing. All he said was "I think you are too tired to do this tonight. Why don't you go ahead to bed."
So here I am. In bed. Nursing my poor finger and my ego while he works on her exersaucer in the next room.
Let this be a lesson to you all. When you know you are too tired to do something, don't even attempt it.
In other news, Abbey is doing great! She's been a maniac today. On my way home, I stopped by Dairy Queen to pick up a milkshake. I ordered a small and the girls behind the counter asked if it was for me or the baby. I quickly said it was kind of for both of us since we both need to add a few pounds over the next two weeks. They laughed and asked a few more questions before one of the girls returned with a LARGE shake. They said to consider it for the baby, refused to let me pay the difference and sent me on my way. Very sweet! But- have you ever seen a LARGE shake from DQ? It's like a freakin 10 gallon drum! Who honestly needs that much? It was one of those cups you almost have to hold with both hands, lol. Out of sheer curiosity I had to look up the nutrition info when I got home. Are you sitting down? 1130 Calories. ELEVEN HUNDRED AND THIRTY CALORIES. Holy Lord. Seriously. I drank it down (poor me, right?) but promptly barfed about 1/2 of it back up. So there goes those calories. I didn't barf it up because of an pregnancy related nausea. I barfed it up because that is an obscene amount of calories to take in and 20 minutes and my body said "Heeeeeeeeeck no", haha! I barfed it up because NO ONE should drink an 1100 calorie milkshake.
So another lesson learned there. Always (politely) turn down milkshake upgrades. Or have some self control and don't drink the entire thing.
28w4d
Tuesday, December 8, 2009
28 Week Appt.
It wasn't great news, but it wasn't terrible. I'll start from the beginning.
So the three pounds I had gained (overall)...pretty much gone. I lost 2 pounds. So we are at one pound total for weight gain. Don't get me wrong, I wasn't skinny pre-pregnancy, but I still should have gained more than 1 pound by now. I'm losing weight which is keeping Abbey from gaining appropriately. Which leads to the next issue.
Abbey is pretty small. Her belly is only measuring in the 12% and overall she is in the 32% for babies at her gestational age. Her head, limbs, organs, fluid levels, cord and placenta all look good right now, she just is a little behind, growth wise.
So now the plan is for me to increase my caloric intake and gain some pounds. Every one keeps saying "Load up on ice cream and Chinese!". Uh, yea, that sounds fun, but (1) I don't feel like eating 99% of the time and when I do, it's never much and (2) I want to gain the weight in a healthy way, not by loading up on junk. I'm loading up on complex carbs and protein in an effort to gain weight but to it in a healthy manner.
AND It sounds like I'm having a C-section. O_O
My ovaries are apparently a real mess. My right one, anyway. From the US yesterday she can tell is it practically ruined and would rather me not have it. Apparently "diseased" ovaries are more likely to develop cancerous places on them and what not, so I'm likely better off without it. Lefty is doing ok and is the ovary we triggered from for Abbey, so I guess the right is a dud anyway.
And if Abbey stays small, she would rather deliver her by csec. Smaller babies sometimes don't do as well with vaginal deliveries and a csec i usually less stressful on them.
She said ultimately the decision is mine, but I really trust her and her partner with my care 100%. If they feel this is best for Abbey, I believe them.
Also, they are going to monitor Abbey every 10-14 days to check her growth and monitor my weight gain. If at 37 weeks she is still tiny, they will do an amnio and go ahead and deliver her. IUGR is one of her concerns and she said those babies tend to do better on the outside than in. Babies with IUGR sometimes have genetic issues or have drug addicted mothers and since neither is the case with our Abbey, lack of maternal weight gain is our only answer. She has not been diagnosed with IUGR at this point and we are really hoping to avoid it which makes it even more important for me to pack on some pounds.
This all makes me really sad. I'm a mess. I feel like a total eff up. I can't get pregnant on my own. Now I can't even provide well enough for her on the inside. How am I going to be a good mom when she is on the outside if I can't provide for her now.
But right now I really don't have time for a pity party. All my energy is being focused towards her and making her grow big and strong. Our goal is full term, but ultimately we know God is in control and will watch over us and take care of Abbey.
We really appreciate any prayers you can spare. We want a full term, healthy little girl and I really believe prayers can get us there.
28w3d
So the three pounds I had gained (overall)...pretty much gone. I lost 2 pounds. So we are at one pound total for weight gain. Don't get me wrong, I wasn't skinny pre-pregnancy, but I still should have gained more than 1 pound by now. I'm losing weight which is keeping Abbey from gaining appropriately. Which leads to the next issue.
Abbey is pretty small. Her belly is only measuring in the 12% and overall she is in the 32% for babies at her gestational age. Her head, limbs, organs, fluid levels, cord and placenta all look good right now, she just is a little behind, growth wise.
So now the plan is for me to increase my caloric intake and gain some pounds. Every one keeps saying "Load up on ice cream and Chinese!". Uh, yea, that sounds fun, but (1) I don't feel like eating 99% of the time and when I do, it's never much and (2) I want to gain the weight in a healthy way, not by loading up on junk. I'm loading up on complex carbs and protein in an effort to gain weight but to it in a healthy manner.
AND It sounds like I'm having a C-section. O_O
My ovaries are apparently a real mess. My right one, anyway. From the US yesterday she can tell is it practically ruined and would rather me not have it. Apparently "diseased" ovaries are more likely to develop cancerous places on them and what not, so I'm likely better off without it. Lefty is doing ok and is the ovary we triggered from for Abbey, so I guess the right is a dud anyway.
And if Abbey stays small, she would rather deliver her by csec. Smaller babies sometimes don't do as well with vaginal deliveries and a csec i usually less stressful on them.
She said ultimately the decision is mine, but I really trust her and her partner with my care 100%. If they feel this is best for Abbey, I believe them.
Also, they are going to monitor Abbey every 10-14 days to check her growth and monitor my weight gain. If at 37 weeks she is still tiny, they will do an amnio and go ahead and deliver her. IUGR is one of her concerns and she said those babies tend to do better on the outside than in. Babies with IUGR sometimes have genetic issues or have drug addicted mothers and since neither is the case with our Abbey, lack of maternal weight gain is our only answer. She has not been diagnosed with IUGR at this point and we are really hoping to avoid it which makes it even more important for me to pack on some pounds.
This all makes me really sad. I'm a mess. I feel like a total eff up. I can't get pregnant on my own. Now I can't even provide well enough for her on the inside. How am I going to be a good mom when she is on the outside if I can't provide for her now.
But right now I really don't have time for a pity party. All my energy is being focused towards her and making her grow big and strong. Our goal is full term, but ultimately we know God is in control and will watch over us and take care of Abbey.
We really appreciate any prayers you can spare. We want a full term, healthy little girl and I really believe prayers can get us there.
28w3d
Saturday, December 5, 2009
Sweet!
Thanks to PCOS, I got the privilege of taking the one hour glucose challenge TWICE.
YAY.
Not really...But whatever I have to do to keep me and Abigail healthy, right? I passed the first one a few weeks ago with a score of 114 (way below the failing mark). I hoped that since I had passed the first one by such a large margin they wouldn't make me take the second one. No dice. So I took it again Friday morning and passed with a 110 this time! Even better! So no more glucose tests for me!
My blood pressure looked awesome (124/79) too, so it was a great day!
And today? I washed sheets, cleaned the master bathroom and bedroom, folded (more of) Abbey's clothes (seriously running out of room!), Windex-ed all the mirrors and shot this awesome video. Please admire my lovely belly, lol. No stretch marks yet, but I am getting bigger by the day so I can only assume they are going to strike soon. Ben and I watched her move and dance around for almost an hour but as soon as we got out the camera out she settled in and got comfy. Stubborn girl. I have no idea who she gets her attitude from! Honest!
Other than that, we are all doing great! We reached the 28 week mark today which is both awesome, exciting and scary all at the same time. Just the thought that we could have a baby in ten weeks is mind numbing to me (and Ben!). I've been dealing with some bittersweet feelings regarding this pregnancy and all the fun milestones we are hitting and the fact that it is all coming to an end soon and the fact that we missed all this with Buddha. It's hard sometimes. I got really overwhelmed Thursday but thankfully Ben was home and just let me cry it out and take a nap. Just as soon as I think the healing process with Buddha is over, all the feelings of sadness and loss rip through me and I feel like part of the healing starts over. I wish we had gotten to experience all of this with Buddha, but I wouldn't trade Abigail for the world. I feel like I am almost forced to choose between the two of them even though it's impossible to do that. A power greater than I can even imagine made the decision for me and I trust that decision with my entire heart, but that doesn't mean it isn't hard sometimes. At the end of the day, I know I have a baby boy who taught me more in 9 weeks than I could have ever hoped to learn in a life time and who I am so insanely proud of and a baby girl who is teaching me how to trust and love again and melts my heart every moment of the day. I am so, so blessed to have them both and I can't thank God enough for allowing me to be their mom.
28Weeks
YAY.
Not really...But whatever I have to do to keep me and Abigail healthy, right? I passed the first one a few weeks ago with a score of 114 (way below the failing mark). I hoped that since I had passed the first one by such a large margin they wouldn't make me take the second one. No dice. So I took it again Friday morning and passed with a 110 this time! Even better! So no more glucose tests for me!
My blood pressure looked awesome (124/79) too, so it was a great day!
And today? I washed sheets, cleaned the master bathroom and bedroom, folded (more of) Abbey's clothes (seriously running out of room!), Windex-ed all the mirrors and shot this awesome video. Please admire my lovely belly, lol. No stretch marks yet, but I am getting bigger by the day so I can only assume they are going to strike soon. Ben and I watched her move and dance around for almost an hour but as soon as we got out the camera out she settled in and got comfy. Stubborn girl. I have no idea who she gets her attitude from! Honest!
Other than that, we are all doing great! We reached the 28 week mark today which is both awesome, exciting and scary all at the same time. Just the thought that we could have a baby in ten weeks is mind numbing to me (and Ben!). I've been dealing with some bittersweet feelings regarding this pregnancy and all the fun milestones we are hitting and the fact that it is all coming to an end soon and the fact that we missed all this with Buddha. It's hard sometimes. I got really overwhelmed Thursday but thankfully Ben was home and just let me cry it out and take a nap. Just as soon as I think the healing process with Buddha is over, all the feelings of sadness and loss rip through me and I feel like part of the healing starts over. I wish we had gotten to experience all of this with Buddha, but I wouldn't trade Abigail for the world. I feel like I am almost forced to choose between the two of them even though it's impossible to do that. A power greater than I can even imagine made the decision for me and I trust that decision with my entire heart, but that doesn't mean it isn't hard sometimes. At the end of the day, I know I have a baby boy who taught me more in 9 weeks than I could have ever hoped to learn in a life time and who I am so insanely proud of and a baby girl who is teaching me how to trust and love again and melts my heart every moment of the day. I am so, so blessed to have them both and I can't thank God enough for allowing me to be their mom.
28Weeks
Monday, November 30, 2009
27 Weeks!
I'm really trying to get back in the swing of blogging but time has not been my friend lately. So here's the 27 Week post and some pics to hold you over!
How far along? 27 Weeks!
Total weight gain/loss: Three pounds total
Maternity clothes? Maternity pants every day and still trying to make my regular shirts work. I am hoping to buy as few maternity shirts as possible!
Sleep: Love it. Love it. Love it. Getting all I can.
Best moment this week: Hitting the third trimester!
Movement: She bounces like crazy and I can't get enough of it. I already know I'll miss this.
Food cravings: Apple juice, apples, applesauce. Anything apple.
Gender: GIRL! GIRL! GIRL!
Labor Signs: No, thank you.
Belly Button in or out? Going, going.....
What I miss: Nothing at the moment...
What I am looking forward to: Our next appt, Dec. 7. I love my OB and can't wait to see her again!
Weekly Wisdom: Make the decisions that are best for you and your family, not ones that will pacify others. How you deliver, feed and raise your child is your business. Don't let others opinions sway you from what you feel will work best for your family. (same)
Milestones: Right now, every day is a milestone. I am more pregnant than I have ever been, so everyday is a huge deal. Our goal is 40 weeks, 37 at the earliest, so every day is one day closer to our goal. (Same as all the other weeks, but still how I feel. I know this has been the same pretty much every week, but it's stiiiiiiiill how I feel)
What is Abbey up to this week?
Let your spouse put an ear to your belly -- he might be able to pick up baby's heartbeat (no stethoscope required). Inside the womb, the formation of tiny capillaries is giving Abbey a healthy pink glow. She's also soaking up my antibodies, getting the immune system ready for life outside the womb. Eyes are forming, and she will soon perfect the blink -- perfect for batting those freshly grown lashes.
All that^ stays the same until Week 28, so don't expect another fruit picture for the next few weeks!
And now for Show&Tell :)
26Weeks
27Weeks
Stay tuned for my (late) Thanksgiving post! I promise it's coming!
How far along? 27 Weeks!
Total weight gain/loss: Three pounds total
Maternity clothes? Maternity pants every day and still trying to make my regular shirts work. I am hoping to buy as few maternity shirts as possible!
Sleep: Love it. Love it. Love it. Getting all I can.
Best moment this week: Hitting the third trimester!
Movement: She bounces like crazy and I can't get enough of it. I already know I'll miss this.
Food cravings: Apple juice, apples, applesauce. Anything apple.
Gender: GIRL! GIRL! GIRL!
Labor Signs: No, thank you.
Belly Button in or out? Going, going.....
What I miss: Nothing at the moment...
What I am looking forward to: Our next appt, Dec. 7. I love my OB and can't wait to see her again!
Weekly Wisdom: Make the decisions that are best for you and your family, not ones that will pacify others. How you deliver, feed and raise your child is your business. Don't let others opinions sway you from what you feel will work best for your family. (same)
Milestones: Right now, every day is a milestone. I am more pregnant than I have ever been, so everyday is a huge deal. Our goal is 40 weeks, 37 at the earliest, so every day is one day closer to our goal. (Same as all the other weeks, but still how I feel. I know this has been the same pretty much every week, but it's stiiiiiiiill how I feel)
What is Abbey up to this week?
Let your spouse put an ear to your belly -- he might be able to pick up baby's heartbeat (no stethoscope required). Inside the womb, the formation of tiny capillaries is giving Abbey a healthy pink glow. She's also soaking up my antibodies, getting the immune system ready for life outside the womb. Eyes are forming, and she will soon perfect the blink -- perfect for batting those freshly grown lashes.
All that^ stays the same until Week 28, so don't expect another fruit picture for the next few weeks!
And now for Show&Tell :)
26Weeks
27Weeks
Stay tuned for my (late) Thanksgiving post! I promise it's coming!
Monday, November 23, 2009
A Quick Rant...
If one more person says:
"Oh just you wait"
"This is only the beginning"
"You have no idea what you are in for"
"Say good-bye to your old life"
or any other negatively toned comment towards being pregnant/having a baby, I will seriously punch you in the throat. It gets effing old.
We had to years to "just wait". By the time Abbey gets here, it will be 4 months short of THREE years.
This is our new "beginning" and we are very much looking forward to it.
Of course we have no idea what we are in for. We know it will be hard and trying at times, but it will also be much wanted and prayed for.
And as for our "old life"- it was amazing, we had amazing times. But our "new life" is going to be so much more amazing than anything we experienced with just the two of us.
So keep all the negative comments to yourself. If you don't have anything nice to say about being pregnant/having children, save them for the next unhappy person who is willing to share in your misery. Because this optimistic, naive infertile and her husband are much looking forward to everything having a child entails.
26w2d
"Oh just you wait"
"This is only the beginning"
"You have no idea what you are in for"
"Say good-bye to your old life"
or any other negatively toned comment towards being pregnant/having a baby, I will seriously punch you in the throat. It gets effing old.
We had to years to "just wait". By the time Abbey gets here, it will be 4 months short of THREE years.
This is our new "beginning" and we are very much looking forward to it.
Of course we have no idea what we are in for. We know it will be hard and trying at times, but it will also be much wanted and prayed for.
And as for our "old life"- it was amazing, we had amazing times. But our "new life" is going to be so much more amazing than anything we experienced with just the two of us.
So keep all the negative comments to yourself. If you don't have anything nice to say about being pregnant/having children, save them for the next unhappy person who is willing to share in your misery. Because this optimistic, naive infertile and her husband are much looking forward to everything having a child entails.
26w2d
Friday, November 20, 2009
Baby Shower #1
My first baby shower was last weekend! I still can't believe I just typed that out. The entire time mom and I were down there I honestly couldn't process that we were in Charlotte for my baby shower. When the balloon lady at the grocery store asked if I was having a girl or boy I almost looked around to make sure she was talking to me. I forget I actually look pregnant now. When I was changing my clothes and getting ready for the shower, I almost started crying. I couldn't grasp this was really happening. We've come such a long way in the past year and it's hard to believe now is our time. It's our turn. It's so surreal.
My childhood friend, Carol, was nice enough to offer her house up as a location for the shower. Her house is just about the cutest thing ever and it was so, so generous of her to offer up her time and home to us! My mom, aunt and Ma along with a handful of high school friends attended the shower. We had an awesome table full of food, a table overflowing with gifts for Abigail and hours of great conversation. I am unbelievably thankful for all the gifts and cards and for the time people set aside to come out and celebrate our little one. I know how busy people are these days and it meant the world to me that these ladies set aside a few hours of their time to come out.
The spread! Chick-Fil-A tray, fruit&veggie trays, cookie tray and CAKE! YUM!
The favors-Pink M&M's and pink Starburst candy! The fabric on the top of the jars is the fabric my mom used to make her bedding!
Thanks again to everyone who came out! Abbey scored a ton of stuff off her registry, many necessities, a few out fits, a handmade sweater and tummy time blanket from my mom and a hand made blanket (and a stock pile of diapers) from my Ma. I really need to start on the "Thank You" cards ASAP.
I suppose I should update a few Belly Pics too, huh? I can tell a HUGE difference between Week 21 and Week 25- and I'm only going to get bigger. It's a scary thought!
24 Weeks
25 Weeks
That's all I'm going to update tonight! We hit 26 Weeks tomorrow! Holy Snot! We are so thankful every day for this HUGE blessing and are loving every minute of this pregnancy. We had another great Dr appt this week (more on that tomorrow) and can't thank God enough for getting us this far (relatively) complication free!
25w6d
My childhood friend, Carol, was nice enough to offer her house up as a location for the shower. Her house is just about the cutest thing ever and it was so, so generous of her to offer up her time and home to us! My mom, aunt and Ma along with a handful of high school friends attended the shower. We had an awesome table full of food, a table overflowing with gifts for Abigail and hours of great conversation. I am unbelievably thankful for all the gifts and cards and for the time people set aside to come out and celebrate our little one. I know how busy people are these days and it meant the world to me that these ladies set aside a few hours of their time to come out.
All the ladies (minus my mom)
The diaper wreath Carol made! How cute!
The diaper wreath Carol made! How cute!
The spread! Chick-Fil-A tray, fruit&veggie trays, cookie tray and CAKE! YUM!
The favors-Pink M&M's and pink Starburst candy! The fabric on the top of the jars is the fabric my mom used to make her bedding!
Thanks again to everyone who came out! Abbey scored a ton of stuff off her registry, many necessities, a few out fits, a handmade sweater and tummy time blanket from my mom and a hand made blanket (and a stock pile of diapers) from my Ma. I really need to start on the "Thank You" cards ASAP.
I suppose I should update a few Belly Pics too, huh? I can tell a HUGE difference between Week 21 and Week 25- and I'm only going to get bigger. It's a scary thought!
24 Weeks
25 Weeks
That's all I'm going to update tonight! We hit 26 Weeks tomorrow! Holy Snot! We are so thankful every day for this HUGE blessing and are loving every minute of this pregnancy. We had another great Dr appt this week (more on that tomorrow) and can't thank God enough for getting us this far (relatively) complication free!
25w6d
Monday, November 16, 2009
25 Weeks!
So, I am aware I suck at blogging lately. Between traveling, working and getting things ready for Abbey, I have NO time (not to mention the 4 hour naps that take up my afternoons).
Short Update: Things are going well! Abbey is moving constantly and growing like a weed. I'm sure I had to have gained weight by this point, I have been eating like a mad woman! I'm hungry all the time. Abbey LOVES all fruit and chocolate milk :) I had our first baby shower this week and as soon as I get the pics loaded, I'll post them. The shower was amazing and I can't thank my mom enough for throwing such an awesome party for our Abbey. Everyone who came was so, so generous and really went above and beyond for our little girl. We are so blessed and thankful!
I'll post more later, but right now, my dinner is getting cold and, as usual, I'm STARVING!
25w2d
Short Update: Things are going well! Abbey is moving constantly and growing like a weed. I'm sure I had to have gained weight by this point, I have been eating like a mad woman! I'm hungry all the time. Abbey LOVES all fruit and chocolate milk :) I had our first baby shower this week and as soon as I get the pics loaded, I'll post them. The shower was amazing and I can't thank my mom enough for throwing such an awesome party for our Abbey. Everyone who came was so, so generous and really went above and beyond for our little girl. We are so blessed and thankful!
I'll post more later, but right now, my dinner is getting cold and, as usual, I'm STARVING!
25w2d
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