I'm still here. I promise.
Right now I am drowning in a sea of school work. It seems no matter how hard I work, the stack just gets bigger and bigger.
I have to do a genogram for a Family Relationship's class I am in (and I really am enjoying this project), but I spend 7 hours (SEVEN) working on it on Friday and am no closer to being done than when I started.
And I have to do these Infant/Toddler and Preschool observations for Child Development, which I also enjoy. But I always leave feeling so empty and sad. In 5 months, I should be having my own infant and I'm not. It's heart breaking to go into centers everyday and be reminded of what I don't have.
I'm so ready for this semester to be over. I am really thankful that I got a week off for my surgery, but I am starting to feel like it wasn't enough time. I am thinking maybe I repressed a lot of what I was going through at the time and flung myself back into my school work to have something to keep my mind busy.
OR maybe I am just having a bad day and need to go back and reread promises I made to all of you that everything would be ok and someday we will have our own baby and I just need to have faith and trust that God will see us through this.
Listening to your own advice is a tough, jagged pill to swallow sometimes.
Boulder Ridge Zoo
1 week ago